It’s supposed to look messy | SHW #22

Hey friends!

This week, I had a pretty big mindset breakthrough that I wanted to share. Over the past couple of months, I’ve noticed that I hit these pretty predictable mid-week slumps. I’m sure I’m not alone, but every Wednesday or Thursday, my mood just comes crashing down. I start doubting everything I’m doing and noticing all of my mistakes and flaws. This hits me pretty heavily when it comes to my art and business. I still feel like I’m in the early stages of figuring things out and fumbling around, and I can be pretty hard on myself.

A tool I learned last year was to think of an area of your life where you’re more growth-minded, and apply some of the helpful thoughts you have there to other areas of your life where you feel a bit more stuck.

I’ve been very consistent with working out and specifically building strength over the past several months. I’m still a total weakling, but I don’t really care and I don’t let that stop me from following through with the work outs. When it comes to exercise, it’s easy for me to trust in the process and believe that if I just keep showing up for the work outs, I will get stronger.

So I decided to dissect how I was thinking about exercise that made believing feel easy. The most helpful thought I have is, “It’s supposed to look messy.” It’s supposed to be this way. When I think that, I just have fun with my work outs. I allow myself to do the modified version of the exercises, move slower, and take more breaks if I need them. I let myself look and feel silly and just have fun with it.

Thinking about my art and business with this perspective released so much pressure. I feel like everything should be buttoned up and I should be knocking it out of the park every day, but the reality is this is all new to me and I’m still figuring a lot of things out. Growth takes time, and it’s okay if I look and feel like a clumsy kid stumbling my way through it every day.

For me, it’s that clumsy stage that makes doing new things so fun. It’s a big reason why I wasn’t happy working as a software engineer anymore. Nothing felt new or challenging. I was just going through the motions and collecting a paycheck. So next time I find myself feeling frustrated with how clumsy everything feels, I’ll remind myself that it’s meant to feel that way, laugh it off, and keep moving.

What I worked on this week

I made some new art this week! I love the cold, wintery months and I wanted to make something that aligned with the seasonal vibe. I also just watched The Lord of the Rings trilogy for the first time, and felt very inspired to draw an elf. Side note: I can’t believe my younger self missed out on the dreamboat that is Orlando Bloom as Legolas 🥵

Anyway, here’s my wintery elf:

I also created a YouTube video of the full drawing process, which you can watch here:

I also turned this drawing into a print! It will be limited edition, signed and numbered. I have only printed 5! I’m doing the same for another illustration I’m working on and will release them both on 1/22. You’ll be the first to know when they’re available.

That’s all I have for you. Have an amazing week and remember to be a little silly and laugh at yourself 🙃

-Rachel